Remember the advert on telly for Skips, featuring Clumsy Col, the accident prone yoof?

Yoof I am not, but I do seem to like throwing myself down the road, track, etc.

Yes, in addition to my history of broken L3 vertebra, sternum, ankle, thumb and finger I’ve now added the same digit on the other hand to the collection. Should I take up chess?

My interest in MTB has morphed in the last year (any correlation with becoming a Mole I wonder?) from being an interest into what I call an obsession.

In fact, I think about MTB almost as much as sex. If you believe what they say then, as a man that means I probably think about MTB every 20 seconds and sex every 10. No wonder my wife complains we don’t speak much!

At the moment, with work issues causing a great deal of stress, it’s a comforting diversion and keeps me afloat. However, I haven’t ridden since Friday 16th Jan due to breaking said finger. Its not that long to be off the bike, but long enough for an obsessive who expects two meaningful rides every week of the year.

Its driving me mad and as a result of my ‘issues’ I’ve started to get this mocking voice in my head reminding me that the fitness I’ve worked hard (and enjoyed) building up lately is slipping away each day.

Thankfully, someone at bikeradar must be aware of my inner wranglings and has kindly published an article on the subject, making me feel a whole lot better so I thought I’d share it.

Matt will read with interest after his unfortunate incident last year and lengthy lay-off that followed.

If like me, you are ‘enjoying’ a forced lay-off of any duration, take heart. Whilst your fitness tails off, it doesn’t really impact for the first two weeks and only starts to become a more serious problem from as much as 8.

In what must be the mtb equivalent of using a crutch, I’m heading out on the night ride tonight (possibly alone – look out of the window) with an inner tube wrapped round my grip so I can hold the bars properly as I can’t form a decent grip (I’ve already done the wanking jokes thanks).

Yes, I’ll be hesitant and slow as I mince my way round and I won’t be getting into any tomfoolery (sounds like a word my gran used) but at least I’ll be silencing the inner voice.